Irish Ice Floe

Yes, technically speaking that's gelato. But this whole thing
is about being fake Irish anyhow. Also, shut up.

It's that time of year again! When everybody lets loose, has fun, and pretends they're a little bit Irish! But just a little bit. Because otherwise we might actually have to deal some of the annoying parts that come from being a member of any large group of humans. People tend to drink to excess this time of year, and while I'm not going to tell you to do otherwise, I am going to warn you not to use the mass consumption of alcohol as an excuse to consume alcohol that isn't awesome. Because that would be sad. And sadness via alcohol has nothing to do with being fake Irish! Well, maybe a little.

Ingredients:

1 Pint Vanilla Ice Cream

3 TBSP Chopped Mint Leaves

3 TBSP Baileys Irish Cream

An unspecified amount of Guinness 

This recipe is perfect for St. Patricks day, for a number of reasons. Mainly because there's no actual cooking involved, which means the odds of you drunkenly setting yourself on fire are slightly reduced. And even if you do manage to go all human torch, it probably won't be the result of this recipe, so it's not my problem. Now what were we talking about? Oh yeah! Ice Cream, apparently. The first step to this recipe is to take your Ice Cream out of the freezer and eat a couple of scoops, because feelings. Then leave the Ice Cream out and let it get a little bit melty. Not so bad that it's 100% liquid, but loose enough that you can stir things in. 

Take your Mint Leaves, thoroughly wash them to remove unwanted dirt and protein, and chop them into itty bitty pieces. The general rule is to chop them forever until the world is a lifeless husk, which means there's nobody left to judge you on the size of the mint bits in your frosty alcoholic treat. Once your leaves are minced and civilization has collapsed, add them, along with your Bailey's into your melty Ice Cream and stir it all up. Which gives us an excuse for having earlier eaten the Ice Cream from the container like a 90's sitcom character. 

Pro-tip: take forever to get your picture set up, so that your

ice cream goes all melty. Still tastes good though.

Put your ice cream mixture back in the freezer, and wait for it to set back to it's original glory. Then break out your favorite beer mug, pour in as much Guinness as your heart contents, clean up the floor from having tried to pour all of the beer you have into one mug, and add your Ice Cream on top! It's delicious, and a good way to prevent house fires that could be blamed on me!